Periscope Depth

on your knees; I want you on your knees

(ring ring ring)

“Hey, it’s Henry over at Captain Morgan. Got a minute?”

“Of course!”

“Listen – just got the thumbnails from that Marisa Miller photoshoot. Very hot. Exactly what we’re looking for. The leather and lace thing, the occasional cutlass. Sultry without being slutty.”

“Ri-i-ght, but …”

“You know there’s a ‘but’, right?”

“There always is.”

(both parties laughing)

“Eh, you know. Anyway, we took it back to marketing, and we were wondering … could you make her hair a little more Eighties?”

“How Eighties?”

“The Eightiesest.”


“Hey, bro, it’s Henry again. Looks like I just missed you. Got the follow-up pics and this is exactly what we’re looking for. You took one of the most beautiful women in the world and made her look like the understudy for a W.A.S.P. video. Give us, like, six or ten more in the same vein. Let’s do some jaeger bombs at McAlligan’s next week, a’ight?”